(Tune: Battle Hymn of the Republic)

We've built this mighty nation with
  our enterprising cash,
We've all become accustomed to a
  periodic crash,
So you mustn't be alarmed if things
  seem to go to smash,
For Profits must prevail.

Private enterprise forever,
Private enterprise forever,
Private enterprise forever,
For Profits must prevail.

Communistic, socialistic, anarchistic
Revolution, insurrection, strikes,
  et cetera,
We'll all join together in a long
  and loud "Bushwa",
For profits must prevail.


We've organized the N.A.M., the
  Junior C. of C.,
Our lobbyists are hard at work in
  Washington, D.C.,
To preserve Congressional confidence
  in a free economy,
For profits must prevail.


Our workers strike and organize and
  call us dirty names,
If their wives and kids are starving,
  we'll admit it's a shame.
We wish that they would understand
  that we are not to blame,
For Profits must prevail.



Oh, my name is Joe McCarthy, I'm the
   leader of the band;
Republicans were worried, till I
   took the witness stand;
We had no red-hot issues, for the
   coming fall campaign,
But when I shouted "COMMUNIST", the
   Old Guard hopped the train.

Oh, Wherry yowled and Bridges howls,
   and Jenner joins the squawkin';
McCarthy leads the orchestra, while
   Mundt says, "Keep on talkin'."
Hickenlooper tootles the flute, when
   Lattimore takes the stand;
The sourest note in Washington is
   Joe McCarthy's band.
Tootle-de-do, try and sue,
Tootle-de-do, try and sue,
Tootle-de-do, I'll tell you more,
But, - I'll never say it off the
   Senate floor.

Right now we are rehearsing for a very
   swell affair
Because before November, we must all
   go on the air.
But we're having lots of trouble,
   mathematics ain't no fun;
We claimed 200 commies, but we ain't
   caught even one.


I am the best detec-a-tive within
   the Senate hall;
I can't be bothered with evidence, I
   use a crystal ball.
I've taught J. Edgar Hoover and his
   boy scout F.B.I.
That proof is not required when
   you're out to catch a spy.


Oh, my Communists keep shrinking; I first claimed two-o-five,
And then I swore 'twas 81, to keep the game alive.
Then, 57 varieties of Reds and Pinks galore;
But Tydings made me stick to facts; I couldn't frame Lattimore.   CHORUS:

We're all pure-minded patriots, but politics is our hobby,
We hate the French and British, but we love the China lobby.
We vote against the Marshall Plan; we won't pick up that check;
But we'll take the Fort Knox gold reserve and ship it to Chiang-Kai-Shek.

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